Who need money?

Customer: I want this X
Me: Ok the price is Y or Z
Customer: well i will go for Y
Me: Ok is Y€ please
Customer: Oh but i have no money...

Wrong number means is for free

Customer: I don't understand why i was billed this 2€
Me (After checking): Well you sent 4 international sms to Cape Verde.
Customer: Oh... but i sent them to the wrong number, why do they bill it to me?
Me: If you send a real mail to someone, but write the wrong address, do they reimburse you the stamp?

How do you dare ask for money?

Customer (Asking for a service): You mean you ask money for that? (With a VERY surprised voice)
Me (Thought but not told): Didn't you notice we don't have a "charity church" sign outside?

Free phone for everyone

Customer: I left my car open last night and someone opened it and stole my phone, what can i do?
Me: Report it to the Police, and buy a new phone
Customer: Can't i have a new phone for free?
Me: No, i'm sorry
Customer: But it cost me 500€!

It's unfair i can't fail to pay 3 bills!

Cust: I didn't pay a bill and they stop my service! WHY?
Me:  Well .. because you didn't pay?
Cust: But is Unfair! Last time they wait till the 3rd unpaid bill to stop my service!

Nothing costs more then something

Customer: Do you have this thing (A brad new model)
Me: Yes i have it fresh from delivery and it costs X
Customer: But in the other place they told me it costs Y!
Me: Why didn't you buy it there?
Customer: They don't have it!
Me: Well maybe this is why it is so cheap..

mathematic is hard

Customer: Why can't i make a phone call? i have 4€ left!
Me: No sir you have MINUS 4€!
Customer: So what does it mean?

feeling exhausted.