The Invisible Ink

Customer: What is my Password of my iPad?
Me: I don't know madam, maybe you wrote it on a piece of paper?
Customer: Yes!
Me: But this is a white piece of paper with just your your name...
Customer: But is what i put in my iPad box!
Me: But your password isn't written here...
Customer: Why isn't written?

Nobody answer me!

Customer: I call the customer service and no one is answering!
Me: Strange.. let's call together... Dial 177 and put it in Loudspeaker
Phone: Press 1 For your Balance, Press 2 to talk with customer service .. Press..
Me: Ok let's press 2!
Customer press the red button to terminate the phone call instead..
Customer: See? No one answer me!

Into the Wild

Customer: I'm going on holiday to the Mauritius Islands
Me: Lucky you, hope you will have a great Holiday!
Customer: But how much will it cost to call from there?
Me: Very remote island, very expensive calls, it will be around 3€/minute
Customer (Talking to the Partner): Ah no, if is going to be so expensive calling i don't want to go there on holiday!

Why don't i have email

Customer: This phone doesn't work! I can't see my mail!
Me: Why sir?
Customer: See? I press the gmail icon but i don't see any email!
Me: But do you have any email?
Customer: I don't know!
(Of course the solution was simply that he don't have any email!)

I don't want to move my finger

Customer: I bought a new phone and facebook isn't working!
Me: No Madam you are pressing the red Tango icon not the blue facebook!
Customer: But i want facebook!
Me: Then press the blue icon
(Customer keep pressing the red tango icon)
Customer: See??
Me: Madam why did u press again the wrong icon?
Customer: because is what i have under my finger!

Future is Yesterday!

Custmer: Why did I paid the monthly bill in advance? (Showing me a January Bill) Me: But what is written in the bill as paying date? Customer: February! Me: So how is February in Advance compared to January?